Erling Haaland dropped a quote that had r/soccer in stitches: "Of course. I want England to do well. I been supporting, I think I got a England Jersey before I got a Norway Jersey." The man is Norwegian. He plays for Norway. And yet, here we are.
I've been collecting shirts for over a decade, and I've heard some wild stuff. But a Norwegian superstar admitting he rocked England before Norway? That's like a Liverpool fan admitting they had a United shirt as a kid. You just don't say that out loud.
So the man had an England shirt before a Norway one. Does that make him a traitor?
Nah. It makes him a kit nerd. I got my first football shirt when I was six—a Brazil one from a car boot sale. I'm English. Nobody accused me of defecting to Brazil. Kids wear whatever shirt their dad buys them or whatever looks cool in the shop. Haaland's dad played for Norway, so you'd think he'd have a Norway kit first, but maybe the England one was cheaper. Or maybe he just liked it. Who cares?
What's funny is the reaction. One comment said, "I was just laughing hard at those words in proximity in that sentence." Fair. It's a weird sentence. Another person pointed out that Americans are created via inheritance while most nationalities are created via inhabitance. That's a whole other debate, but it's a decent point about how we think about national identity.
I don't think Haaland loses any sleep over it. He's too busy scoring goals and being a giant.
The Norway team seems to have a Haaland problem
Did anyone else notice the vibe in the England vs Norway match? There was a moment where a Norway player took a shot instead of passing to Haaland, and it was an absolute howler. It felt like there was some resentment. Haaland was out there bantering with the England lads more than his own teammates.
I've seen this before. When you have a superstar in a smaller national team, egos get weird. The other players know they're sidekicks, and sometimes they try too hard to prove they're not. That shot instead of a pass was a perfect example. Haaland has done himself proud, but he looked like he was having more fun chatting with Rice and Foden than with his own countrymen.
The invite is still open, Erling. Just saying.
If not England, then who? I'd rather France win than Spain or Argentina
This is where I get opinionated. If England don't win the next World Cup, I'd rather France do it than Spain or Argentina. Why? Because I like an intimidating villain narrative. France winning two World Cups in a row would set up the next one perfectly. Everyone would be desperate to stop them. That's entertainment.
Spain and Argentina? Fine teams, but boring. Argentina already had their Messi fairytale. Spain's tiki-taka was great a decade ago, but now it's just possession for the sake of it. Give me France steamrolling everyone and becoming the team everyone loves to hate. That's proper drama.
Plus, have you seen France's kits lately? Clean. Simple. Not over-designed. That matters to a shirt collector.
What about the 4-4-2 Brexit football shout?
One comment said, "4-4-2 proper Brexit football. If the Argentinians are gonna play dirty we're going to as well." That's a whole mood. I'm not saying I agree, but I get it. International football brings out the petty in all of us. If the other team is kicking lumps out of your star player, you want your lads to kick back. It's not pretty, but it's honest.
Haaland would probably thrive in a 4-4-2 anyway. Just lump it up to him and let him bulldoze defenders. Old-school. I'd watch that.
Anyway, the point is: Haaland's shirt confession is harmless. The Norway team tension is real. And France winning again would be hilarious. Fight me.
